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Former Iowa Linebacker Christian Kirksey Is Super Duper Small In The New Madden Game

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SI- The developers of Madden 15 apparently didn’t work out all of the bugs in this year’s game. Last week we showed you the glitch which sent a lineman hurtling skyward. Today we have an isty bitsy linebacker.  Aww, look how cute and little he is. This is apparently a pretty common glitch. Several users have reported the same problem with the “Madden Solo Challenge” when playing as Christian Kirksey, a rookie linebacker from Iowa who is not actually as undersized as Madden would lead you to believe.

 

Well what the hell is this shit?  Apparently one of the glitches in the new Madden game is that former Iowa linebacker Christian Kirksey is really really small.  Listed at 1 foot 2 inches.  The first glitch we saw was dudes getting tossed way up into the air and now this.  Disrespecting a former Iowa Hawkeye by making the size of the Indian In The Cupboard.  And why is Kirksey on the Titans in the new Madden game?  He plays for the Cleveland Browns.  He’s actually been one of their (if not the) stand out rookie for them on defense during the preseason.  Not bad for a third rough draft pick.  And this is how he’s repaid?  By looking like an action figure out on the field.  The whole thing is very confusing and total bull shit.  Somebody get the people at EA on the phone and make Christian normal-sized right now.  Seriously though, why is he playing for the Titans in all of the screen shots I’ve seen of Tiny Christian Kirksey?  That might be the most dumbfounding thing.  Well besides the part where he’s 1/1,000,000,0000 the size of the other players.

 

PS- I’d be lying if I didn’t laugh at that Vine where the quarterback hurdles Tiny Kirksey and then Tiny Kirksey gets leveled by his own guy.  Absolutely absurd and hilarious.

By trent posted September 1st, 2014 at 8:16 PM

Never A Doubt, 1-0

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Never a doubt!  And of course by that I mean doubts all over the place but the Hawks still pulled out the first win of the year over Northern Iowa.  It was PAINFULLY clear that the secondary is going to be an issue for the inexperienced linebackers and safeties.  Northern Iowa hit home run after a home run down the heart of the field and burned Iowa repeatedly.  Everybody looked completely and totally lost at times.  Despite that, the Hawks looked pretty good.  Jake Rudock had a good day.  Didn’t throw any picks and had a couple of touchdowns including a beautiful one-handed catch by Tevaun Smith.  The defensive line looked solid as expected.  All in all, not bad.  But seriously, if our secondary can’t cover Northern fucking Iowa we’re in for a long season.  But hey, 1-0!  Still undefeated.  Can’t complain too much about that.  #HawkeyeNation

 

Let’s take a look at that one-handed Tevaun Smith touchdown.  A beauty.

 

 

By trent posted August 30th, 2014 at 2:42 PM

Iowa Football Preview- Defense And Special Teams

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Yeah!  Football!  Tomorrow!  The return of all things Iowa Hawkeyes tomorrow.  I already posted the pump up video earlier today and now let’s take a closer look at the defense that’ll be steam rolling teams throughout the season.

PS- The most underrated part of the season returning?  The return of Gary Dolphin.

 

D-Line:

 

We’ve come a long way in a short amount of time. Just a few years ago the talent in this unit was near the bottom of the Big Ten.  These days Iowa boasts one of the top defensive tackles in the country in 300 LB Carl Davis who CBSSports.com has as the #2 senior defensive tackle in next years draft and the prototypical workhorse in Louis Trinca-Pasat playing next to him.  This unit will prove to be one of the top forces in the conference this year, if not the country.  The depth of the interior line took a little bit of a hit this week with the announcement that Darian Cooper would be missing this season due to shoulder surgery.  But fortunately this is one of the positions Iowa can afford an injury.  Look for Jaleel Johnson, Nate Bazata, and Faith Ekakite to provide big contributions and a glimpse into the future for this unit.  On the edges Iowa lacks an elite pass rusher just like they have in the past few years. Drew Ott is a good athlete who plays with a chip on his shoulder and a “won’t take shit from anybody attitude”  If you had a “Who would I not want to fight on this team” list… Scherff is obviously #1 but Ott might be #1A.  It has to be noted that he was the 2014 Solon Hay Bay Toss champion unseating former Hawkeye and New York Jet Matt Kroul’s reign of dominance.  The wildcard on this unit is Nate Meier.  Meier played 8-man football in high school and his style of play was likened to a “Bear loose in a children’s zoo” by the CR Gazette’s Marc Morehouse.

 

Linebackers:

 

Biggest question mark on the whole team.  Replacing three all conference caliber players in one season is going to be tough even if you have a roster full of blue chip recruits.  Iowa will be filling those three spots with a 5th year senior a 17-year-old freshman and a walk-on.  On the surface that sounds pretty fucking terrible, and the more I read it the worse it sounds, but Quinton Alston the senior would have started for plenty of teams last year.  He just had the bad luck of being behind All Big 10 James Morris for three years.  There are people around the program who felt that Alston was the better option at MLB last year so we will see what happens.  17 year old Reggie Spearman has the weakside backer position this fall, he, like Nate Meier, saw a lot of time on Iowa’s blitz packages last fall and is looking to take that experience into a full time role.  The strong-side will see a pair of walk-ons splitting snaps come Saturday, Travis Perry and Bo Bower will look to continue Iowa’s tradition of walk on success stories, both have made significant strides since coming on to campus.  Perry is a senior who is a great story.  His Dad is overseas serving our great country in Iraq.  Bower is from West Branch. He could’ve taken a scholarship with some smaller programs but chose to walk on with the Hawks and his gamble has paid off.  He already earned a scholarship in his first camp and listed as a co-starter with the senior Perry.  Look for young guys Ben Niemann and Josey Jewell to see some time early in the season and on special teams .  Depth is an issue with this unit and a significant injury could have a real big effect on how the season goes.

Secondary:

 

As the biggest fan of The Wire on the planet I want “You come at the King you best not miss” shirts to become a thing because sophomore corner Desmond King is the real deal.  He’ll be tasked with locking down everybody’s number one.  And if last year is any indication he’s more than up to the task of taking on every team on this schedule’s number one wide receiver.  The second corner spot is still up for grabs but it looks like it’s going to former receiver Greg Mabin.  Mabin showed enough in camp to leapfrog Maurice Fleming.  Both Fleming and Mabin have elite speed so Mabin’s ability to transition to a new position and grab a starting spot says a shit ton about his athleticism.  Iowa’s deep with talent at the corner position but that talent is short on experience.  If King were to miss a couple snaps look for opposing offensives to challenge the young guys deep.  The strong safety postion sees a familiar face in John Lowdermilk return, fan favorite Nico Law chose to leave the team in the offseason which killed any chance of a controversy.  But this job was Lowdermilk’s to lose no matter what.  Forgetting his boneheaded dropping of an INT return at the one yard-line in the Outback Bowl Lowdermilk played well for his first season as a starter.  He’s a big safety and isn’t afraid to come up and support the run. His experience will be vital to getting a young back seven in position play in and play out.  Jordan Lomax was moved to the free safety spot to spark competition this spring and never let this spot go.  Lomax was a lock to be the starting corner opposite King this fall so Lomax’s move speaks to two things: 1) The coaches are comfortable with the depth of talent at the corner position 2) Lomax has too much talent to keep off the field.  Iowa’s safeties aren’t asked to do extradorinary things athletically.  They’re traditionally smart players who are always in the right spot to make a play (Looking at you, Tyler Sash).  Lomax brings a level of athleticism to the position that Iowa hasn’t had in recent years and will be fun to watch develop.  One to watch: Miles Taylor.  Taylor was a late flip from Georgia Tech and will see significant time on special teams this fall.  Iowa traditionally defaults to redshirting freshman unless they show them something in camp, Taylor appears to have done that and more and could see some time in the early season if the offense is hitting on all cylinders.

 

Special Teams:

Kicker: Just make the damn kick.

Punter: Just don’t get it blocked.

Kick Returns: Iowa’s depth at running back has allowed them to put speedster Jordan Canzeri back to return kicks, look for him to make more than one explosive play this fall.  Also keep an eye out for young Akrum Wadley who could spell Canzeri late in games early in the year.

Punt Returns: See Kevonte Martin Manley vs. Western Michigan …. Enough said.

By trent posted August 29th, 2014 at 12:35 PM

Professor At Iowa Plans To Put Together A Protest Against The Pink Locker Rooms At Kinnick Because He Thinks They Promote Homophobia

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College Football Talk- The Iowa Hawkeyes have had a long-standing tradition of having the visiting locker room painted pink. It was a brain game move by former head coach Hayden Fry in 1979 and has remained a part of attempting to give Iowa a home field advantage. A professor at Iowa is planning a formal protest against the pink locker room at the same time the school plans to honor Fry on Friday. Kembrew McLeod is organizing a “million robot march” to protest what he believes demonstrates the university allowing the football program to taunt an opponent by pushing homophobia and sexism. It has been suggested the pink finish in the locker room is designed to break down the visiting team’s mental toughness. Whether it works or not is probably uncertain for sure, but there must be something to having the pink finish all these years. This is hardly the first time a concern about the pink locker rooms has surfaced at Iowa though. the gimmick has been criticized by a number of feminists, lawyers, gay rights activists and more over the years, and there will likely be more to come in the future as long as the locker room remains pink. McLeod tells the Associated Press he and his fellow protesters will dress as robots and shout “Binary code yes! Gender binaries no!” as they address their concerns on Friday. Iowa has no plans to redo the visiting locker room at Kinnick Stadium. “To tear that apart and spend the money right now to redo that just seems like a very low priority to me,” University of Iowa president Sally Mason said. “Would a pink locker room have been my first choice? Probably not. But that predates me by quite a little bit.”

 

Fuck this guy.  He’s not the first or last person to raise a stink about the pink locker rooms at Kinnick.  Just a few months ago somebody at the Daily Iowan wrote a piece about how Iowa should get rid of the licker room because it promotes rape culture.  Here’s part of that blog I wrote then and it’s still true now:

 

Talk about making a mountain out of a mole hill here.  This is a classic example of a newspaper having nothing to talk about and then going out and actively looking for a fight on a hot button issue.  Like, “Let’s see.  What can we talk about that might cause a ruckus…..the pink locker room at Kinnick? That’s kinda sorta but not really sexist, right?  And then we can throw around buzz words like ‘rape culture’ and really get people fired up.”  It’s ridiculous.  It’s a pink locker room.  That’s all it is.  Not everything needs to be examined, broken down and then ultimately decided that it’s offensive and needs to be gone.  You can do that with just about anything if you look close enough.  The pink locker room was a funny idea/psychological experiment by Hayden Fry.  Paint the opposing locker room pink and see if it makes a difference on the field.  Does it?  Statistics would say probably not.  The Hawkeyes aren’t exactly going undefeated at home each season.  And after awhile it just became a joke and kind of a cool thing that was just part of the Kinnick Stadium experience for opposing teams coming to Iowa City.  But then in came the PC police and the Daily Iowan kicking down the doors yelling sexism and rape culture for reasons unknown and wanting it gone.

 

All of that is still true.  This time around it’s a professor at Iowa who is raising a stink for now reason.  It’s a pink locker room.  Fucking relax.  No way in hell are those things, and those things alone, promoting homophobia and sexism on a college campus.  I’d say there’s a hell of a lot bigger issues to cover.  This guy just wants to get mad at something and he found his cause.  He’s getting a shit ton of play with this robot protest he’s putting together too.  What the hell is a robot protest?  NBC Sports just tweeted out a link talking about it.  Where am I?  What planet is this?  And I said it in the last blog but I’ll say it again.  It’s no mistake that the professor is raising a stink about it now when sexual assault cases are a hot button issue for the University of Iowa and Iowa City right now.

I do love U of I president Sally Mason response.  Basically “You think I have the time and money to tear down a pink locker room because you have a weird fascination and think it promotes something it doesn’t?”  Sally has bigger issues to deal with like real sexual assaults happening on campus all too frequently that are a real problem.  Not some room football players from out of town get dressed in.  Get fucked, guy.

By trent posted August 28th, 2014 at 5:07 PM

Amanda Dufner Just Sending Out Pool Ass Shots In The Middle Of The Day

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Jason Dufner stays winning.  Simple as that.  Even when he’s sidelined by injury his life is still the best life in the world.  Daddy Duf can look out his window and see his SMOKE wife catching rays next to the pool, toss in a dip and remember, “Oh yeah.  I’m…..I’m hittin’ that.”  The rule, as always, is it’s great to be Jason Dufner/to be a rich fat guy with money because you can land a hot wife no matter what you look like.

 

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h/t gordon

 

By trent posted August 26th, 2014 at 12:59 PM

Iowa State Football Defensive And Special Teams Preview

Football girls

College Football season is in sight, so I am back to preview what will be a hopeful year for the Iowa State Cyclones, who have been picked ninth in the 10-team Big-12 Conference. Today, we will take a look at the defense and the special teams units, followed by the Cyclone offense and season outlook later in the week.

DB’s: It is never a good sign when three of the top five tacklers on the 2013 defense came out of this unit. The pass-happy Big-12 offenses do have some reason for that, but the returning members of the defensive backfield still have yet to tackle a Baylor Bear. The other Sam Richardson is back, and is still 5’7”. The guy plays hard and had 53 tackles last year with 7 pass breakups, but 0 interceptions in 12 games. At the other corner, Nigel Tribune started seven games, and had a nice pick against Oklahoma State. The answer at the Safety spots will be tough to figure out, after losing Washington and Broomfield. JUCO players hope to fill those voids, hopefully, due to a lack of young talent. These guys will be tested, and without steady QB pressure, it could be a long season on the back end.

LB’s: The leader of the defense in Jeremiah George is gone to the Jets, meaning Jevohn Miller will have to step up at Will. Jared Brackens showed flashes last year at Sam, but had his three best tackling games against UNI, Tulsa, and West Virginia. Granted, there were very few tackles made last season against Baylor (L, 7-71), Oklahoma State (L, 28-58), and Oklahoma (L, 10-48). This unit has to step up in every game if the Cyclones don’t want to again give up 50+ ppg against the powerhouses of the conference.

DL: Maybe the best part about the defensive line for Iowa State is the fact that it gets a training camp against one of the best offensive lines in the conference. The guys are big, but are young and inexperienced with only 3.0 sacks returning from last season. Two of the sacks came from Cory Morrissey, who led the line with 6.5 tackles from a loss in 2013. Other than that, much like the Safety position, the starters against North Dakota State on August 30th are anybody’s guess.

Punter: No more Kirby Van Der Kamp means there’s an open punter call for the Cyclones this season. Colin Downing and Holden Kramer will battle it out to replace what was the best player on Iowa State’s roster last year. Not a typo; the best player on last year’s roster was a punter.

Kicker: Ankeny’s own Cole Netten is back after a successful freshman campaign in which he went 13-for-18 on field goals, including 10-for-11 from under 40. You have to feel okay about the kicker more than any other position in the first half of this preview, which is good for a program known to shank the occasional 22-yarder.

Returns: Wideout Jarvis West returned punts last year and had a kickoff return for a touchdown, as did DeVondrick Nealy. A lot has to happen for touchdowns in the return game, but if the Cyclones can end the season with 4-5 of these, it can only enhance their chances at a bowl bid.

For the defense to be successful, a ball-control offense would help. However, Iowa State is going to keep up with the rest of the country in Mark Mangino’s offense and utilize their strengths in the passing game. If Downing/Kramer can pin opponents deep like Van Der Kamp was able to do a season ago, the youthful defense will have a little less pressure taken off. While the offense will be fun to watch, the defense will be challenged weekly, along with the livers of Cyclone Nation. It feels like the defense is a year away from being mediocre, whereas the offense is a year away from being great.

 

By ggilson3 posted August 26th, 2014 at 12:30 PM

Freshman At Iowa Decides To Take It Easy The Night Before Classes Start So He Overdoses And Causes His Entire Dorm To Be Evacuated

 

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Press-Citizen- The University of Iowa’s Slater Hall was evacuated Sunday night after a student was hospitalized with apparent overdose symptoms and staff found suspicious chemicals in the dorm room. Special Agent in Charge Dan Stepleton with the Iowa Department of Public Safety’s Division of Narcotics Enforcement said officers responded Sunday evening to a report of a disoriented student in the lobby of Slater Hall, a university residence hall west of the Iowa River south of Grand Avenue. “What happened was we had a young man from the dorm, apparently looked like they were suffering from probably overdose symptoms of an illicit narcotic,” Stepleton said. According to a UI news release issued Monday, UI police responded about 7:45 p.m. Sunday and the student was transported to UI Hospitals and Clinics for treatment about 8:20 p.m.According to the news release, the student is recovering at UIHC and the Office of the Dean of students is investigating to determine if any UI policies have been violated.UI spokesman Tom Moore said he could not discuss the student’s medical state because of confidentiality rules.Moore said members of the hall’s housing and dining services staff entered the student’s room to perform a welfare check and found chemicals and other suspicious items.

 

Yeah!  School’s back in session!  Go big or go fucking home.  Set the tone early.  That’s what this kid is all about.  I ‘d say for the most part kids heading into the Monday of their freshman year take it easy and prepare for the upcoming semester.  Which means the majority of the student body looks like a bunch of pussies compared to this kid right here.  The article doesn’t say what drug the kid overdosed on but that’s a fact I don’t need right now.  Whatever it was he took enough of it to OD on the Sunday before his freshman classes started which forced the entire dorm to be evacuated and that’s spectacular.  This kid can play for me any day of the week.  Not only did he overdose on whatever drug but the article makes it sound like he was also making/cooking/growing the drug in his dorm room.  The word hero gets thrown around a lot in 2014 but I think it’s safe to say this kid is a hero.  He just set the bar about as high as it can go for a class of students heading into their freshman year.  Good luck everybody!

 

PS- Did any freshman at Syracuse OD the night before classes started?  I didn’t fucking think so.  Party School Scorecard: Iowa 1, Syracuse 0.  Give the crown back.

By trent posted August 25th, 2014 at 3:38 PM

Volunteer At The Barclays Face Plants And Breaks His Face Into A Million Pieces

 

Down goes the golf volunteer!  Looked like he got hit by a sniper sitting in the gallery.  No way he didn’t break his face into a million pieces.  No way no how.  Face plant city.  The reaction from the crowd was priceless.  ”OHhhhhhhh that guy might need facial reconstruction surgery/be dead”  Classic.  Nothing ruins a peaceful Saturday of volunteering at a golf tournament faster than running your face into the ground at full speed on national TV.

By trent posted August 23rd, 2014 at 4:45 PM
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